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How should parents deal with their children?

[Ms. Thrylokya asked:- Swami, how should parents deal with their children, starting from their childhood?]

Swami replied:- The scripture says “Rājavat pañcavarṣāṇi, Daśavarṣāṇi dāsavat, Prāpte tu ṣodaśe varṣe putraṃ mitravadācaret”. Meaning:-

i)   From birth to the end of the 5^th year (5 years), parents should treat their child as the king by serving it in all angles with a lot of care.

ii)  From the beginning of the 6^th year to the end of the 15^th year (10 years), parents should treat their child as a servant. Servant will not work sincerely in a disciplined way unless you show seriousness and harshness from all angles. This is the teenage years in which the child becomes terribly undisciplined. In this age, if discipline is not taught perfectly, the child will become undisciplined throughout its life when grown up. In this age, sweet love should not be shown. Showing harshness in this age is the real love towards the children.

iii) From the beginning of 16^th year onwards, the parents should treat their child as a friend by giving advices in a logical way to their children. The advice must be covered by a layer of politeness but the content shall be in the welfare of the child only. Even harsh advices can be given, but in polite language.

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